Monday, March 9, 2009

He Blogs, She Blogs: The Truth Comes Out

Today we have questions I, personally, have always wanted the male perspective on, so I am pretty pumped to read what my bud Captain Dumbass has to say. And hopefully all you ladies will be just as thrilled to get some answers to these age-old questions (well, maybe not age-old, but at least a couple decades old). As most of you know, He Blogs, She Blogs is a fun way to get both sides of the story on some burning questions from our readers, and have some laughs along the way. Today we have questions from Jerlyn from BadKarma, who just happens to be CAPTAIN DUMBASS' MOM (how awesome is THAT?), Alice, Moonspun from Moonspun Spins, and Giggle Pixie from Caffeine and Cabernet.

So let's see what Momma Dumbass wants to know: age old question that has never been addressed. Why do men clutch the tv remote to their chests, why do they carry them with them
around the house. and WHY for heaven sake do they insist on flicking through channels to 1/2
watch some other show-AND MISS GOING BACK TO THE SHOW U WERE
TRYING TO WATCH. a lot of hostility here!!!

Thank you Jerlyn! This is an issue we have every day here at the Wise Young Mommy house. My husband has come dangerously close to having his head cut off (or at least his sheets shorted) for surfing during the commercials and not going back to whatever we were watching, thus causing me to miss VITALLY IMPORTANT portions of the show. How rude. Why is it that he finds it necessary to flick around from a baseball game, to Ultimate Fighting, to The Girls Next Door, to Yankee Workshop or some other horrid DIY show that he never watches more than five minutes of so he would never be able to "do it himself" anyway? Not to MENTION the fact that I will be looking for the remote and find it stuffed in the couch cushions, on the kitchen counter, in the bathroom, or lying ALONGSIDE the other remote in the bedroom. What is so hard about putting the remote down in a visible area when leaving the livingroom? It's not like I would DARE to change the channel, knowing fully well that the television is obviously his domain because of all the high quality manly programs of which he has to see two minutes each. But then, when I finally put my foot down (for House, American Idol and Big Love ONLY), wouldn't you think it would be simple human decency to NOT change the channel during the commercials and get caught up watching some show on engineering bridges on National Geographic so that by the time you switch back, I have missed something important that prevents me from being able to keep track of what is going on? Simple human decency, folks. Is that so much to ask? I think not.

As you can see, Momma Dumbass, there is some hostility tied into this issue for me as well ;)

Alice said: Okay, here's one for you: why the h*ll can't I see Mr. Linky? I can't link up on any of the good Carnivals anymore!

All right, maybe that won't work for he blogs/she blogs. How about the long hair vs. short hair thing?

OK, I have no idea about the Mr. Linky thing, but the long hair vs. short hair discussion is a hot topic for me. I have had every length of hair, from a super short pixie cut when I decided I had had enough and literally told my neighbor to cut it all off, to long hair past my ass that I would sit on. And there is one conclusion that I have come to: I just don't feel as attractive and womanly with short hair. I always regret it, I always end up crying, and I always then wait rather impatiently for it to grow back. Luckily, I haven't cut it real short in a while, not since I did it right after my daughter was born (one tip: hormonal, sleep-deprived mom + drastic haircut = DISASTER), so I think I have learned my lesson. However, every time I cut it short I have at least a dozen and a half people tell me that short hair looks SO good on me, and that I have "the face for it," whatever that means. And those same people, when I tell them that I don't feel as attractive or womanly, tell me that it doesn't matter whether my hair is short or long, that it still looks attractive and sexy and all those things that I have always yearned to be and never felt I was. Obviously, my husband tells me that he would love my hair at any length, and that he has liked it short, but I just know that secretly he likes it better long. I am sure that it is a personal preference and that not every man feels the same about it, BUT I have this feeling in my gut that most men prefer long hair. Maybe it's because of all the images I have burnt on my brain of long-haired, big tittied women who are plastered all over men's mags and billboards across the country. That could be it.

Moonspun said: ANYway...question for HBSB: What's you belief on 'spousal privelege?' If your BFF or someone tells you a secret and says "don't tell anyone" do you think they will know you are going to tell your better half? Because that what your better half is for? To hold secrets like that because you trust them and need to bounce the secret off someone you know will be true to you. Thoughts?

Oh, this is a tough one. I have to admit that I tell my husband almost EVERYTHING I do and say with almost EVERYONE I interact with. Most topics of convo with anyone are fair game for me to bring to my husband, because he is truly my best friend and sounding board, and I don't like to keep anything from him. That being said, if someone close to me told me something having NOTHING TO DO WHATSOEVER with my husband or our relationship and they promised me not to tell ANYONE because it was that sensitive or embarrassing, I would keep that promise. I also realize that while talking to any of my friends that anything I say will probably be relayed to their significant others, thus I don't say anything I wouldn't want passed along, unless I preface it with a "please don't tell anyone, EVEN your husband." Because I know how close and sacred the bond between man and wife is, and that few things are kept out of that circle. But friendship is sacred too, and if there is something my friend doesn't want people to know, I will guard it with my life. Cause I would want them to do the same for me.

Giggle Pixie said: Why can't I get my husband to understand that walking into a room and saying "Wanna go have sex?" doesn't exactly make my motor purr?

Especially when, if I take him up on the offer, he throws off all his clothes, jumps into bed, and then just lays there waiting for me to "make something happen"?

I am very sorry to say that I can't relate to this one, because I am usually the one that says "hey, wanna go have sex?" and then proceeds to go get naked and lay in the bed and wait for him. I'm not really sure why, I guess when I get in the mood, I just want to get on task and get going. No need to waste time, right? But believe me, once I am in the buff and awaiting the fun to begin, I fully intend on getting "warmed up" if you will, before anything is going anywhere. Men seem to think sometimes that we are just like them and can just "turn it on" at any moment and be ready for penetration. Haven't they learned by now that when that tactic is used, things are only painful and awkward? My biggest complaint is when I wake up in the middle of the night to hubby on top of me and, let's just say at 2:30 in the morning when I have been sleeping for four hours, I am not exactly "prepared." But I have to admit that my hubby is usually VERY good at getting me fully ready for the "big show." Sometimes I think men just get a tad ahead of themselves. Again, due to the blood being taken away from the brain to the genitalia. It's scientific.

There you have it. Those are my thoughts, now head on over to the Captain's place and see what he had to say. I know I am anxiously awaiting his answers this week.

You may have noticed the new header that I made (shut up, I am no graphic designer) on this week's post, and there is also a nice little button to the right just waiting to be snatched up by YOU and put in your sidebar on your blog. Please, help spread the word about He Blogs, She Blogs, get all your friends in on the fun and display that little sucker on your site. It would be MUCH appreciated and I will give you tons of virtual hugs and kisses. XOXOXOXOXOXOXO See? I told you.

And finally, Captain Dumbass and I would like to announce that we will be changing the He Blogs, She Blogs schedule a bit so starting next week we will be posting it on THURSDAYS instead of Mondays. Sorry if we mess up your week or confuse you. Feel free to lodge a complaint. Simply go to Captain Dumbass' blog and leave a disgruntled comment.

Sorry Cap'n.

I hope everyone has an incredible week and keep coming back for more He Blogs, She Blogs shenanigans!!