Monday, December 29, 2008

MISSION: Monday Sponsors He Blogs, She Blogs Edition 2

Good morning folks! Today is a very special edition of He Blogs, She Blogs, because it is being featured over at Halftime Lessons and Dirty Socks and Pizza for the finale of MISSION: Monday! Jim and I were stoked to be asked to participate by Jay and Deb in the big year-end grand prize giveaway over at their blogs, so if you haven't entered yet, head over there and get in on the action! Just click on the banner below:

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And now on to HBSB (which is now the cool, "hip" way to refer to He Blogs, She Blogs--everyone is doing it (if everyone includes me and Jim). Today we have queries from the rockin' daddy, Goodfather, the always fabulous Bee from Bee's Musings, the oh-so-Creative Kerfuffle, and the yo-diggity-Mama Dawg. And now, on with the show...

Goodfather wrote: Dammit, I thought Jim was MY BFF. Sigh. Unrequited BFF-dom.
OK, here's a topic: toilet seat UP or toilet seat DOWN. The spin? How the kids are involved. Go.

I think this problem between men and women has existed since the very first toilet seat was created many years ago by some dude who thought it would be funny to hear a splash and an explitive every time his wife went to the john after him. I must admit that I have had my husband potty trained for years now after many instances of my ass splashing in that cold, disgusting water, usually in the middle of the night when I wasn't paying attention, and I'll tell ya, nothing wakes you up like a startlingly cold, wet poop chute. HOWEVER, we had a new problem when the second dude of the house started using the indoor plumbing, and all of a sudden, I had to start dealing with this issue all over again, not to mention the whole issue of his aim not being what it should be. It seems, no matter what I did, I ended up with a wet bum, because he either forgot to put the seat down and I got an impromptu ass-bath or he would just leave the toilet seat DOWN and kinda lazily aim his little pee-pee in the general direction of the toilet, thus spraying the seat and leaving a nice wet surprise for Mom the next time she sat herself down on the throne. After many heated discussions about how there are girls living in this house that sit down EVERY TIME and that he needs to try to get ALL the pee into the toilet, then put the seat down, I think he finally has it. Almost FIVE. YEARS. LATER.

That's a lot of wet ass...

One of my very favorite bloggers, Bee, from Bee's Musings said: I love your answers!

I have a question for you for sometime.
Why do men (and I mean mine just in case I offend any men) always pretend to listen? I'd be okay if he said "I can't pay attention right now because I'm killing Orcs" then I'd know to tell him later. I tel him and I ask "did you hear me?" and he says yes so I move on. Then we hit deep shit when I find out he didn't actually listen.

Ha ha! Now I'm ticked! :o)

You are so not alone, Bee. I can't tell you how many times I have gotten the nod and the "uh-huh" when I am talking, only to ask him what I just said and he has no idea. My favorite is when he tries to remember a snippet of what I said and makes up something involving one or two words. Nice try, pal. I don't know about other husbands, but I know personally, with mine, I have to make sure that if I want him to retain and/or respond appropriately to anything I have said that I must do one or more of the following:

1. Wait for a commercial break and mute the television

2. Make sure I have complete eye contact and ask "Are you listening?"

3. Preface my statement/question with "This is important, I need you to listen to me right now."

4. After I have spoken, ask for him to repeat what I have said and if he cannot, repeat any or all of the above steps until desired result is achieved.

Otherwise, it's fair game and I know that he may or may not remember what I have said. But, this comes in handy when I want his approval on something that I think he may not be supportive of, so that when he questions that purchase I made, I can say "I asked you if it was OK last week and you nodded and said 'uh-huh'"

Creative Kerfuffle wrote: ok, here's a question for you: do guys want romance the way women want romance? what IS romance to a man?

Ah, romance, one of the ultimate dividers of dudes and chicks. I am really not sure if romance even matters at all to most men, but I know that for me, I can't get enough. I want flowers for no reason, I want to be told I am beautiful on a regular basis and I want candles and rose petals on Valentine's Day. Unfortunately, I think that most men use romance as a way to get women to sleep with them and once we are obligated to sleep with them because of those wedding vows, there is no need. But, personally, I need romance now more than ever because mommyhood has a way of making a woman feel about as sexy as a rock. You want to get me hot and bothered and ready to jump your bones hubster? Whisper some sweet nothings in my ear and tell me you can't get enough of me and I will ride you into the sunset. All the frivolity and sappiness may not do much for men, but the end result is the same--getting laid. So if men were really smart (which we know they are not--sorry guys, you're not when it comes to this), they would humor us and use romance more often and see how much more frequently they get their swerve on. Just sayin'...

And last, but certainly not least, Mama Dawg asked: How do you (the collective you) feel about dating single parents? Granted, IPR, I know you're married and since I'm not sure about Petra (haven't checked her out yet), it's just what you think.

Well, Mama, this happens to be something I know a little bit about. I am married to my husband of four years whom I met seven years ago at a birthday party with his adorable 1-year-old son. Yes, he was a single dad himself and I had absolutely no qualms about dating him (even though I was only 22 years old myself and still in college). For me, I fell in love with his son before I fell in love with him, and it was a no-brainer to continue seeing him. In our case, I just knew, right from the beginning, that there was something special about this man and his little boy. I wasn't even scared away by the psycho ex-girlfriend and baby momma who did everything in her power to erase me from the picture. But, here we are, seven years later, with full custody of my stepson and I wouldn't change a thing. If I hadn't taken a chance all those years ago on that single dad, I wouldn't have the gorgeous family I have today. So I think that answers your question...right?

Well, thanks everyone for joining us for the second installment of He Blogs, She Blogs (or HBSB for the "cool kids"). If you haven't already, head over to Jim's place and read his responses and feel free to drop us a topic suggestion in the comments section of either of our blogs and we will be sure to get to it in the future.

And don't forget to head over to Halftime Lessons or Dirty Socks and Pizza and take advantage of your last chance for the MISSION: Monday grand prize giveaway!

Peace out!